What does God think of ME?

If you struggle with your self-esteem, care too much what others think, have daddy issues, or relationship troubles, you will want to keep reading…

Recently I had the chance to speak at my boys’ school for their Spiritual Emphasis days.  I actually did two workshops for girls only.  The title of my session was “She’s Beautiful!”  The emphasis was on how to build a healthy self-esteem.   I wanted to help them answer the following questions before we finished our session…

1.  Who do others say that I am?

(What do others think of ME?)

2.  Who does God say that I am?

(What does God think of ME?)

3.  Who do I say that I am?

(What do I think of ME?)

 I thought I would take a few moments to share with you some of what I did with them on that day.   The teaching itself was way too long to put it all into one post so I have broken it up into several parts.  This is part three.  

You can read the other two posts here…“She’s Beautiful” (Part One) and “What if Barbie was a real woman” (Part Two).

We tackled the first question in my last post… Who do others say that I am?  We looked at the world’s view of beauty and discovered that we can never really measure up to their standards.  It’s totally unattainable.  Besides, ultimately we should only care about one person’s opinion in the long run… God’s.

 

I Sam. 16: 7 says…

“People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (NLT)

God looks beyond the surface of our lives.  He sees beauty inside and out!  You don’t have to convince Him to love you with fancy clothes, perfect skin, pretty make up or the perfect body.  He loves you for YOU… inside and out!

He doesn’t want you to be like everyone else.  God loves VARIETY!  He wants you to be YOU… the best YOU, you can be and me to be the best ME… I can be!  Different isn’t a bad thing.  It’s a God-thing. 

“Just because you aren’t like everyone else doesn’t mean

you are any less of who God created you to be.”

God want you to be YOU!   He made each of us different, unique, and special in our own way.  You were no accident.  You were made on purpose!  You are unique!  There is not another YOU out there in the whole wide world.  YOU are an original made by God… a masterpiece!

Psalm 139 is one of my favorite passages in the Bible.  It reminds me of God’s love for me.

You created every part of me; you put me together in my mother's womb. ¹⁴ I praise you because you are to be feared; all you do is strange and wonderful.  I know it with all my heart.  ¹⁵ When my bones were being formed, carefully put together in my mother's womb, when I was growing there in secret, you knew that I was there— ¹⁶     you saw me before I was born.  The days allotted to me
had all been recorded in your book, before any of them ever began.

(Vs13-16)(GNT)

God KNOWS you and me and LOVES us still!  It blows my mind!  God’s love is unconditional, fierce, and all consuming!  He chases after us and never wants to let us go.  We are always on His mind and in His heart. 

For some of us this is hard for us to comprehend because we haven’t experienced a relationship like this before.  Maybe our relationships have been one-sided, conditional, or self-centered.  That may be, but the relationship we have with God should be different.   Did you know that if we don’t have a proper view of God, it can hinder our relationship with others?  

Let me explain…

Some of us have been blessed with amazing fathers here on earth which is awesome, but others haven’t been as fortunate.  When they think of a dad, a good, happy image does NOT come to their mind.  Those images are attached to pain, rejection, hurt, and brokenness. 

Because of this without realizing it, those with “bad dads” can begin to relate to God as they do their earthly fathers.  If their earthly fathers are: judgmental, angry, tear them down, and rarely show them love, then they can begin to expect their heavenly father to be the same way! 

When bad things happen, things don’t go their way, or they face adversity, they may feel that God doesn’t care about them, they are unloved, or rejected by Him in some way.

But, God is nothing like our earthly fathers!  He is the best daddy you could ever imagine!  If you have been fortunate enough to have an incredible godly dad, you may see things differently.  Your dad has been able to be a small reflection of God to you.  He has probably helped you see God in a loving, approachable way which is awesome! 

Imagine what you would see if you weren’t as fortunate to have a godly dad in your life.  How would you relate to God in view of an abusive, unloving dad as your reflection?  If we don’t have a proper view of God, it will affect how we live our lives and every other relationship we have in a negative way.  I mean if God doesn’t really care about us, then what is the point of trying to “be good”?

When our view of God is wrong our relationships and our view of what is truly beautiful can become distorted! We can begin to seek attention and value from others instead of God.

We can begin to think…

Pretty is showing our skin to get attention

(Dressing immodestly isn’t pretty.  It may turn the heads of others, but not for the reason you are thinking.  You are attracting the wrong kind of person and not someone you would want to some day marry.  I can promise you that!)

Letting others do whatever they want with our bodies is okay and expected.

(No it’s not!  God wants you to save your purity and the viewing of your body for your future husband!)

  

You are a daughter of the King so…

Walk like it

Talk like it

Dress like it

…and wait for a Godly man who will treat you like it!

God wants us to find our value, worth, self-esteem, and identity in Him!

We are loved, accepted, forgiven, wanted, and cherished.  Believe it today! 

If you have been struggling with comparing God (your heavenly father) to your earthly father, I want to challenge you to search the scriptures.  Make a list of all of the qualities you find in God as your father as you study.  Then compare them to your earthly father.  Ask God to help you to see Him for who He truly is.  It will be life-changing for you!

When we have a proper view of God, it changes things!  There is a song I love that paints such a beautiful picture of who God is to us.  It’s called… “Good, Good Father”.  You can listen to the song HERE. When we have a proper view of God, it changes our perspective on life and our relationship with others.

When I discovered for myself what kind of father God was to me… 
It changed things.  It changed ME!

I’m not sure what your daddy issues might be, but I encourage you to give them to God.  Let Him be that daddy you’ve always wanted and dreamed for.

My goal through my teaching was to help the girls answer 3 questions before we finished…

1.  Who do others say that I am? 

My answer to this is… Who cares?  Their opinion of you and me doesn’t matter.

2.  Who does God say that I am?

You are a beautiful masterpiece, one of a kind, made on purpose!  He wants us to find our value in Him not anything or anyone else.  He wants us to see Him for who He truly is… our heavenly daddy who loves us fiercely!

The last question was one for them to think about on their own to some degree.  They have to decide this for themselves…

3.  WHO DO I SAY THAT I AM?

Or… what do I “think” of myself?

If I don’t like me, it can cause me to go to great extremes to get others to like me.  But… when I discover WHO I am in God and that I don’t have to try to measure up to the worlds ideal view of who I should be, that sets me free to just be ME… the “me” God created me to be!

I hope you have been challenged in some way by the teaching I shared at this workshop.  I would LOVE to hear your feedback!  YOU are beautiful friend and God loves you fiercely!  Don’t you ever forget it!

Living to leave a legacy,

Julie

“What if Barbie was a real woman?”

If you struggle with your self-esteem, care too much what others think, have daddy issues, or relationship troubles, you will want to keep reading…

Recently I had the chance to speak at my boys’ school for their Spiritual Emphasis days.  I actually did two workshops for girls only.  The title of my session was “She’s Beautiful!”  The emphasis was on how to build a healthy self-esteem.   I wanted to help them answer the following questions before we finished our session…

                                                          1.  Who do others say that I am?

      (What do others think of ME?)

2.  Who does God say that I am?

      (What does God think of ME?)

3.  Who do I say that I am?

     (What do I think of ME?)

I thought I would take a few moments to share with you some of what I did with them on that day.   This is Part Two from my original post “She’s Beautiful” (You can read Part One HERE).

YOU are beautiful!  Is that hard for you to believe?  

Well… it’s true!  Say it out loud for all to hear, “I’M BEAUTIFUL!”

The idea of being “beautiful” is a big deal to us whether we realize it or not.  We really do care what others think about us on the outside.  But, what makes someone “Beautiful”?

We could ask a million people today this same question and probably get a million different answers.  It really comes down to how “we” define beauty.

For some Beauty is defined by the perfect shaped body, the right color hair, a perfect complexion, or lightly tanned skin.  For others it’s all about personality, smarts, and what’s in the heart. 

Did you know that there are “tools” that help us measure outward beauty?  Three come to mind for me… a mirror, a scale, and measuring tape.

Have you ever looked into a mirror and not liked what you saw?  I have!!!  It seems that the larger the mirror we look into, the MORE imperfections we find.  “I’m too fat, my nose is too big, my hair is too frizzy or too straight, my eyebrows are growing together… yikes!  This body is out of control!” 

We never seem to be perfect enough when we look into that magic mirror, do we?  But, think about it…

                             Who decides what the perfect reflection should look like?

Have you ever gotten onto a scale and not liked the number you saw? I have!!! Maybe you avoid scales like the plague or only check it at the doctor’s office.  Nobody ever seems to be skinny enough when they stand on it.  That special number recorded on the scale can be a good thing or a bad thing... depending on the person.  For most it’s a secret number never shared with others.  But, why?

                            Who decides what weight is the perfect weight for everyone?

Have you ever used measuring tape to determine how small or big an area of your body is compared to others?  I have!!!  Some of the girls in my workshop didn’t even know what a measuring tape was when I held it up.  I explained that it was used to help measure every nook and cranny of your body to see if you are the perfect size… and it’s used for sewing too of course.   But, think about it…

                                        

                                          Who decides what that perfect size should be?

I don’t know about you, but when I was a kid, “Barbie” was our role model.  Everyone wanted to grow up to be like this little doll.  She was skinny, had long, beautiful blonde hair, perfect white teeth, an amazing wardrobe, a cool pink car, a horse, a fancy house, and a hunk of a boyfriend named Ken. 

                                The big problem with Barbie is that an “Unrealistic Image” 

was placed in our minds as children that we could never attain. 

The perfect reflection, weight, and size of Barbie is totally impossible for anyone to ever accomplish!  We can NEVER measure up to it!  Let me explain…

Check out the comparison of Barbie’s measurements to those of an average woman below.  Barbie’s size and measurements do not add up to balanced proportions.  If she was a real woman, the closest comparison would be to that of someone who is severely anorexic.

What would life be like if a REAL woman had Barbie's body?

Based on her measurements, her bones would be frail causing lots of problems.  Her head would be two inches larger than the average  American woman's resting on a neck twice as long and six inches thinner.  Because of this she'd be entirely incapable of lifting her head.  She would have to walk on all fours to get around because her feet are so disproportionately small and her legs are so long.  She would have trouble standing because her chest would pull her forward onto her toes.  To top it all off, her head would be the same circumference as her waist meaning she would only have room for half a liver and few inches of intestines.   The result would be chronic diarrhea and death from malnutrition.  This is not what every girl dreams of when she imagines being like Barbie when she grows up.  

                       Did you know that 3 Billion women on the planet don’t look like Barbie?

(Only 8 women will ever come close.)

 Barbie vs. Average

                                   Barbie                   Average Woman

Height	5’9”	5’5”
Head	22”	20”
Bust	39” (FF)	36” (B)
Waist	19”	34”
Hips	33”	40”
Weight	110 lbs (35 lbs underweight for her height)	140 lbs
Shoe Size	Size 3	Size 8.5

These measurements are totally impossible!!!   Nobody could ever accomplish this with out paying a lot of money out for plastic surgery and/or becoming severely anorexic in the process.

God did not create each of us to look like ONE person here on earth.  God likes variety!!!  The world has fooled us into believing that we have to change ourselves to become this PERFECT ideal of Barbie.  But nobody can do it! 

The rules aren’t fair when they make the “perfect ideal” so out of reach for us and they use Photo shop among other programs on all of the images they show us of skinny, perfect people in magazines and on TV.  Even the models who are in the pictures don’t measure up to these Barbie standards.

Do you remember those initial questions I was hoping to answer in my workshop for the girls?  The first one was…

Who do OTHERS say that I am? (What do others think of me?)

My answer:  Who Cares?  It’s not worth my time or energy.

I’m sure glad God doesn’t see us the same way the world does.  He looks beyond the surface of our lives into our hearts.  He sees beauty inside and out.

I Samuel 16:7 says…

“People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (NLT)

Be watching soon for my next post in this series of notes from my workshop for the girls called… “What does God think of ME?”

I hope if nothing else you have learned from this blog post that we can NEVER measure up to the world’s standards of beauty.  It is totally unattainable and a waste of time.  God made you the way you are for a reason!  He adores you and thinks YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!  Believe it friend!  It’s true!

Living to leave a legacy,

Julie

"She's Beautiful!"

  

Recently I had the chance to speak at my boys’ school for their Spiritual Emphasis days.  I actually did two workshops for girls only.  The title of my session was “She’s Beautiful!”  The emphasis was on how to build a healthy self-esteem. 

I started drafting my thoughts a month in advance.  I had awesome props, great ideas for group involvement, and a dynamic presentation prepared.  All went well until half-way through my first workshop.  In the middle of sharing my voice became weak and my speech began to slur.  I noticed I was having trouble putting my words together.  This was all too familiar for me.  I was having a flare up and this was a bad one.

  

I explained to the girls what was happening to me and that I needed their help.  They jumped right in to assist me.  I had different ones read scriptures I prepared, some parts of my notes, and even lead out in song (I was never planning to do that!  Nobody would ever want to hear me sing!).  The song was beautiful! 

The girls listened closely as I attempted to share what God had put on my heart.  They had such sympathetic and caring hearts.  I felt bad, like I ripped them off on their workshop even if I couldn’t do anything about it.  It was frustrating.

I had a two hour break before my next session so I thought I might be okay.  I was hoping it would give time for my voice to recover.  I had no such luck.  I could tell before beginning the second workshop that I would have trouble so I improvised.  I found a dry erase marker and wrote tons of stuff on the board behind me.  They were main ideas I wanted the girls to take home with them if I couldn’t present things very well.  By the time I was done, it was covered with truths I hoped some how landed inside their hearts.

  For the second workshop I started off explaining my dilemma.  The girls seemed very sympathetic and wanted to help me as well.  For this one I couldn’t get very far into my teaching before my voice started falling apart.  I had many different girls assist me in reading main points in my notes, scriptures, and this time we sang the whole song together of “Good, Good Father” (Listen to the song HERE).  It was SO beautiful!  I wish I could have recorded the girls singing for you to hear.

After each point we discussed, I would have the girls say out loud… 

“I AM BEAUTIFUL!”  

The first group was very quiet all along when they said it like they didn’t believe a word they just said.  The last group (with more of the older girls in it) said it loud and proud.  They even shouted it at the end for everyone to hear down the hallway in the other workshops.  It was powerful!

At the end of each workshop I had the girls share something that stood out to them from my teaching time.  I wanted to verify in some way that something I said got inside or at least they heard it.  From what they shared, many of them had been impacted by my attempts to communicate with them.  What God had put on my heart had gotten into theirs in bits and pieces!  God is faithful!

I headed to work immediately after my last workshop to finish up paperwork.  I was lucky to even get off to be there this year to speak.  The minute I hit the parking lot at work I called my doctor’s office.  If I didn’t get this flare up under control, things would get out of hand quickly.  By the time I got home that night my voice was pretty much gone and I was very weak.  The dreaded autoimmune disease strikes again!  Boo!  (To read more about my condition click HERE).

 As I got home, I began to re-play my day in my mind… mainly those workshops.  I prayed the girls got something out of it despite my personal issues and limitations.  Just saying that frustrates me.  Each workshop had about 17 girls in them.  The first group had more of the middle-schoolers and the second one had a good mix of middle and high school girls. 

I thought back over the day… I started each workshop off by giving the girls a sheet of paper to fill out while we waited for everyone to arrive.  It was entitled, “5 things I like about ME”.  Some of the girls did a double take.  They thought it said “didn’t like”.  They were hoping it said that because that was a much easier list for them to write.  As I walked around the room, I saw many blank pages.  They couldn’t think of anything they liked about themselves.  It was sad.

For many of us, this would be true of us too.  The struggle is real.

Once they all arrived I introduced myself and jumped right into my teaching time.  I shared how if God was here in the flesh today beyond a shadow of a doubt I know He would brag on you and say… “That’s my daughter isn’t she BEAUTIFUL!”

I told them that we were going to talk about Beauty, Barbie’s, Boys, and the Best daddy ever. 

I wanted to help them answer 3 questions they might be asking themselves

1.  Who do others say that I am?

(What do others think of ME?)

2.  Who does God say that I am?

(What does God think of ME?)

3.  Who do I say that I am?

(What do I think of ME?)

Since this post is getting long, I’m going to push PAUSE.  I want to be able to share with you all of the specifics I did with the gals on that day.  It was powerful and life changing! 

  

Be watching soon for more details to come in my next post called, “What if Barbie was a real woman?”

If you struggle with your self-esteem, care too much what others think, have daddy issues, or relationship troubles, you won’t want to miss this post.

If God was here in the flesh today beyond a shadow of a doubt I know He would brag on you and say… “That’s my daughter isn’t she BEAUTIFUL!”

(and for the guys reading he would say…”That’s my son, isn’t he HANDSOME!”)

Believe it, its true!  God is bragging on you!

Living to leave a legacy,

Julie

“An Old-Fashioned Hello”

The Christmas season has officially begun.  I turned on the Christmas music yesterday.  I don’t know why, but it just seems wrong to begin celebrating before Thanksgiving!  

I guess people were pretty excited in my town this year.  The week before Thanksgiving you could view Christmas lights and trees up everywhere.  We could have taken a car tour around town and had a full night of viewing if we wanted to!

Don’t you just love all the holiday spirit…“Christmas movies, Christmas music playing on your favorite radio station (everyday, all day long), special holiday beverages, bells ringing, and decorations galore.  Not to mention all of the Christmas cards you get in the mail from those close to you and far away spreading their Christmas cheer.  It’s a fun time of year!

I like to get the Christmas cards where it says more than just a “Merry Christmas” or “love so and so”.  I like it when people take the time to write a little note inside.  It adds something special to the card.  It says… I was thinking about you as I sent this BEYOND just writing my name out.  It’s more personal that way.  At least, I think so.

I’ve been trying to teach my oldest son the art of the “Thank You” card.  He is going on a special mission’s trip with his senior class in May to Costa Rica and he is raising funds to go.  He has sent out several letters asking for prayer and support from friends, family, church folks, and the like.  As a result, several have sponsored him to go.

Each time we hear of a new sponsor, I have him send out a “Thank You” card.  At first, he acted like it was a chore I was making him do until he heard a recent response from a recipient.  It was a lady from our church that said…

“This is the first time I have EVER received a personal thank you from anyone I have given money to for a trip at your school.” 

It really meant a lot to her.  My son was impressed.  I reiterated to him that a “Thank You” card is a personal way to show how much you appreciate what someone else has done for you.  It means a lot more when you send it out in the mail… even if you could hand deliver it.  It shows you planned ahead, thought of them, and care.  Sometimes the extra effort to do the snail mail route says more.  It’s a nice surprise!

Have you ever received an “Old-fashioned Hello” in YOUR mailbox?   Something besides a Christmas card?  Was it a “Thank You” card or maybe even a hand-written letter.  My husband and I wrote letters to each other for a whole summer that we were apart in college.  I still have those special notes and cards.  I couldn’t wait for the mail to come each day, hoping there was a special surprise for me!

Recently I opened my mailbox to find a surprise.  It was an old school, handwritten letter (on lined paper and everything with more than one page attached) from my cousin.  I think she sent it to me as a challenge to write her back in the same fashion.  She COULD have written me via Facebook message or email, but she chose this route.

I left the hand addressed envelope and letter beside my computer for days to remind me to write her back.  It tormented me.  She lives in Germany now and it was so much easier to just catch up online, but it wasn’t as personal.

When the letter arrived, it brought a flash of memories of her and me writing one another as teenagers.  We lived two hours away from each other.  It was our way of staying connected.  Long distance phone calls were way too expensive back then.  We shared our life with one another on paper and it was special!

I think somewhere along the way we have lost something with the progression of technology.  I’m not saying all technology is bad, but something is missing… and I think that something may be the art of the “Thank You” card and the “Old-fashioned Hello”.  The personal touch that says I really care.  It’s time we bring it back!

With that in mind, I have a challenge for you.  Last year my family decided to keep up our Christmas cards.  We left them hanging from the doorway well past new years so we could pray for each family who sent us a card.  It was amazing and so powerful!  We even sent a picture of the card some sent us months later to show them we prayed for them that night.  It was awesome!

My challenge is this…

I dare you to send me a Christmas card this year.  But…not just any card.   Send me one with a special, personal note inside.   Of course put the “Merry Christmas” and the “from so and so” too, but also write me a note of how we can pray for you this year.

This gives you the chance to step out of your comfort zone and do something “Old-fashioned.  It also gives me the chance to surprise my husband (Shhhh!!!).  I want all cards from this post to be sent to him at work (Faith Church).

Send cards to:

Al & Julie Davis

2817 E. 53^rd St.

Anderson, IN.  46013

I dare you to get more personal when it comes to showing your love and appreciation for others this year.  Add a stamp and make it special.  The “Old-fashioned Hello” never gets old.  I promise!

Living to leave a legacy,

Julie